Waving goodbye to my 40s with a primrose yellow opera glove.

Saturday, January 8, 2011

Be Off With You

Things that need to go away for a long rest:

Orla Kiely and her expensive pears

Boots with buckles all over them

PJs with glitter and PJs with roll-up button tab straps

Anything with roll-up button tab straps

Nighties without rack support

Skirts that revolve because making a proper waistband is too much trouble

Mandarin collars

Epaulettes

Blouses that don't button all the way up (I'll decide thank you)

Caffe Nero

Overtaking on a roundabout (you are all mad)

Layering: tight jeans tucked into tight boots covered with a thick woolen knee-length tube covering a long T shirt covered by scarves. For example. Can't breathe thinking about it.

You are welcome to add to the list.

Edited to add:

'Waterfall' Cardigans.
Is that a knitwear section or did Walgreens open its Halloween aisle?

15 comments:

  1. 'Skirts that revolve' made me laugh.

    I will come back when I've thought of some.

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  2. I don't know. I like layering - it covers my huge backside.

    Orla Kiely currently has a thing with Tesco going on - you can get a jute shopper with pears on it for £4. Possibly that may be enough to kill the brand.

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  3. Annie - Come baaaaacckkkkk.

    GSE - Has she now? She did a similar deal with Target ("tar-jhay", no not really) in the U.S, tossing some of her creations in plastic and paper to increasingly hysterical home-decor blogging crowds.
    I tried the layering described above and I looked like Mr Pickwick.

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  4. Cardigans with short sleeves - what's the point?

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  5. Okay - skinny jeans. I like them, I just can't, and they make me sad.

    Stripper shoes. C'mon! You can't walk anywhere in them! They are ugly and impractical.

    Everything that costs over about £50.00. Everything seems to have got ridiculously overpriced. (£75.00 is the new £35.00 I've noticed.)

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  6. an example of a stripper shoe. I mean, £170?
    http://www.kurtgeiger.com/online-shop/171200-carvela-glitter

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  7. anything with skulls... must go!

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  8. Hello Timorous Beastie - Yup. I brought several over from TX and they're useless here. In hot climes they're great for a bit of cover when the dance hall has an a/c hurricane thing going on. Now, a short version of a dressing gown is required.

    Annie - Skinny jeans make me itch. Yes, there.

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  9. Annie - Porn shoes. I say that loudly in shoe stores that carry them.
    Whoa Neddy! That's a glittering example.Faking an orgasm or tottering, either way she'll have somebody's eye out.

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  10. Annie - Stuff is certainly pricey, especially garments that fit. I've always stalked well-made things until they go on sale; I do that here, but they're still too expensive. Out of ideas.

    Sarah - Do bikers secretly crave costume jewelry?

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  11. My accountant.

    Whenever I see stripper/porn shoes now, I just assume it must be a drag queen wearing them. Saw some brilliant ones on the tram the other day and I thought, "Oh, good old Berlin. Drag queens on the tram and no-one batting an eyelid," but then it turned out to be a woman, and she didn't make nearly as good a drag queen as a drag queen would have. She tottered off the tram with her hair wrapped over her face because she was embarrassed at being eight foot four.

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  12. Pleite - Yes, off with him.
    You have reminded me that, ten days in to 2011 and I haven't enjoyed my annual screening of 'La Bonne Annee' (it has a very 70s drag club scene featuring a French singing sensation). Thanking you.

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  13. I should have elaborated - I mean like the skulls on scarves that were everywhere. I just found it annoying. Like really twee girls were wearing to what - look tough?
    http://www.selfridges.com/en/Menswear/Skull-chiffon-scarf_424-2000084-4010Q/

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  14. Sarah - Proving that I should get out more: I missed this phenomenon. Peculiar. Wear once on 'The Day of the Dead' then put in drawer?

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  15. Hah:) well maybe i was seeing things but I did see a lot of skull scarves and not on bikers or goths which I can excuse.

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